Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
