Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
