Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
