One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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