do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
