I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
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