you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
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