The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
