I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
