not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
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