I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Randomize
