I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Can you bring me the toilet please
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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