Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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