Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Randomize
