I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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