He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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