Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
