jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
