Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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