funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize