that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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