I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
i out mim tonsoeep
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
