listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
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