OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
