I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I am available for nakedness
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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