I'm so fucking centered right now
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
We have so much sex to catch up on
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
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