I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
