I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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