they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
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