I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize