My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
We are two peas in an std pod
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
