haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
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