just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
