Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
