Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
