I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I want a musical about memes.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize