Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
