Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
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