I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Randomize
