they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I think i got beer on your cat.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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