i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
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