so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
