just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
