Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
The feeling are messing with the penis
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
