So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
