In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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