remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
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