before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
