Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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