Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
