CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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