how can u be prego again
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize